I went to the San Diego Sports Clinic because I wanted someone to help me.
I was hurting. Both feet. My right knee. My lower back. My shoulder. My hip.
I expected physical therapy. Exercises. Maybe somebody would show me what I was doing wrong and give me something I could work on.
The doctor spent quite a bit of time with me. He asked a lot of questions, did an evaluation, and then sat down and very matter-of-factly told me what he thought might be ahead.
More testing first. But probably a series of seven surgeries over the next couple of years. He even suggested a wheelchair might eventually be in my future.
That scared the daylights out of me.
I was 53 years old. This wasn’t the future I had pictured.
So Peggy and I Started Looking
I didn’t storm out of the doctor’s office convinced that he was wrong.
I didn’t know if he was wrong.
I just knew I wasn’t ready to accept that surgery after surgery was the only road available to me.
So Peggy and I started doing research. Not because we knew what we were doing.
Because we didn’t.
We found resistance stretching. I tried it. Something started changing.
We found a Rolfer who was able to give me relief in my feet. That helped too.
One thing led to another. We read. We asked questions. We found people who knew things we didn’t know. We tried things that made sense to us and paid attention to what happened.
Some helped more than others.
But slowly, I started getting my body back.
Nobody Handed Us the Answer
That’s the part I sometimes forget when I tell the story now.
Nineteen years later, I know a heck of a lot more about movement than I did then. Peggy and I eventually trained extensively in resistance stretching. We became Master Trainers. We studied yoga and other movement practices. We opened RiversZen.
Looking backward, it can almost seem like there was a path.
There wasn’t.
There was just the next thing. And then the next thing.
We didn’t know where any of it was leading. We just kept looking.
That’s why I’ve become such a believer in taking responsibility for your own health. But I want to be careful about what I mean by that.
It doesn’t mean you shouldn’t go to doctors. It doesn’t mean you should ignore medical advice. And it certainly doesn’t mean you should diagnose yourself with something you found on the internet at two in the morning.
Good grief.
Taking responsibility doesn’t mean doing everything yourself.
Sometimes it means finding more people to help you.
Nobody Will Care Quite Like You Do
I’ve had good doctors. I’ve learned from wonderful teachers. I’ve worked with talented practitioners who knew things I didn’t.
I needed those people. I still do.
But none of them wakes up in my body every morning. None of them knows exactly what it feels like when I bend over, climb a flight of stairs, get out of bed, teach a class, or walk down the street.
And none of them has as much riding on the outcome as I do.
That’s my job.
I can ask questions. I can get another opinion. I can learn. I can decide that something doesn’t feel right and ask why.
I can try a reasonable alternative and pay attention to what happens. I can change direction when something isn’t working. And I can accept help when I need it.
That’s not rejecting expertise.
That’s participating.
You Don’t Have to Know the Answer
I think this is where people sometimes get stuck. They know something needs to change, but they don’t know what to do.
So they wait.
I understand that.
When I walked out of that sports clinic, I didn’t have an answer either.
I had fear.
And Peggy.
That turned out to be a pretty good start.
We didn’t solve nineteen years of health problems that afternoon. We found one thing to try. Then another.
That’s all you may need to do too.
Maybe there’s something in your life you’ve quietly accepted because you assume that’s just the way it is now. Pain. Stiffness. Poor balance. No energy. Difficulty getting off the floor.
Maybe you’ve already been told what your future looks like.
I can’t tell you that the answer is resistance stretching. I can’t tell you there’s always another solution. Sometimes surgery is exactly the right answer. Sometimes medication is. Sometimes the smartest thing you can do is listen to the expert sitting across from you.
But you can still participate.
Ask questions.
Understand your choices. Get another opinion when it makes sense. Find people you trust. Learn what you can. And pay attention to your own body along the way.
Nobody Is Coming
I still believe that. Just not the way I once might have said it.
Plenty of people may come along who can help you. If you’re fortunate, you’ll find some really good ones.
But nobody is coming to take ownership of your health for you.
That part belongs to you.
At 53, I didn’t know how dramatically my life was about to change. I didn’t know there would someday be a RiversZen. I didn’t know I’d be teaching movement at 72.
I certainly didn’t know Peggy and I would spend the next nineteen years helping other people find possibilities in bodies they’d started giving up on.
All I knew was that I had just been shown a future that scared me.
So we kept looking.
Maybe that’s where taking control of your health begins. Not with knowing the answer. Not with having the perfect plan. Not with waiting for someone to rescue you.
With deciding you’re going to keep looking.
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